Sunday, April 17, 2011

Fears -- Unreasonable? Perhaps. But They're Mine.

With things changing so drastically in my life lately and the added motivation of a fun linky party [and with my craft supplies locked away until we move into our own place] I decided to do a personal / confessional post today. 

I've always been afraid of certain things.  Sure, them seem rather ridiculous and silly when I tell people about them, and maybe they are, but I do have reasons!  Ok, maybe not good enough reasons to totally justify the fear... but maybe they will help you not laugh at me quite so much. :)

- The dark.  Yes, to this day I am still afraid of the dark.  [Ha, what a way to start out the list!]  Why am I afraid of the dark?  Because of all the things that could be in the dark either indoors or outdoors i.e. wild/rabid/poisonous/otherwise dangerous animals (Okay, it doesn't have to be dark for those to be around, but the dark makes the fear of those things even more poignant.  I've heard too many stories about people getting bitten by poisonous insects or snakes, mauled or killed by bears, mountain lions entering populated cities, etc.), ghosts or evil spirits (Yes I believe in those, but I'm guessing this fear comes mostly from years of watching "real" ghost TV shows with my siblings when I was a kid and listening to everyone I know tell their stories of the supernatural, plus it doesn't help that I have an overactive imagination too), robbers/murderers/otherwise dangerous people (I blame the media, horror movies -- which I don't actually watch but the trailers are enough, and the few people who choose to do evil things which leads people to be suspicious of each other.)  Funny side note - when I was younger I used to want to sleep with the brightest nightlight available and as many as possible, but now I have trouble sleeping at night unless it is very, very dark. 

- Natural Gas.  More specifically, natural gas in homes.  It seriously gives me major stress to turn on a gas stove.  Standing there with the lighter going "click, click, click" while an extremely combustible gas pours into the room?  Yeah.  And those knobs on the front of the stove perfectly available to my kids who love to turn knobs?  I'd like to kick the genius who thought that one up.  (Speaking of that, my sister-in-law actually has one with knobs on the side of the cooking surface, much better idea)  Newer furnaces, water heaters and stoves have mechanisms that shut off the supply of gas when the pilot light goes out, which is great, but if you're living with older appliances no pilot light = leaking gas = not good.  Then earthquakes (being in California) can cause a whole lot of other problems with gas lines.  Then comes all the stories I've heard about explosions.  [One about a man who was working on something, needed a very specific part which he didn't have, left to go to the store to get it, noticed the smell of gas and told the utility workers who were digging in the street.  Gas leaked out of the pipe, through the ground, filled the crawl space under his house until it got to the level of the pilot light in the water heater.  BOOM.  The man came home to find he had no more house, although he was blessed with his life.  True story, my mom knows him.  Another one about a gas leak in a woman's home.  The utility personnel came and were outside with her.  The phone rang so she went inside to answer it, one worker followed her to try to get her out.  BOOM.  They both died.  I heard this one from the best friend of the utility worker.]  Not worth it in my opinion.  When I design and build my own house (some day!) it will be all electric, solar and wind powered. 

- Deep Water. Meaning any deeper than up to my neck when standing.  Okay, I don't have a real excuse for this one.  Other than the obvious fear of drowning.  Whenever I look at a satellite picture of an ocean (especially if I can see how the water gets deeper, or the bottom drops off) I get creeped out and have to look away.  I get scared being in boats over deep water.  Random.

Those are the main ones I've had ever since I can remember.  Then, having children has added a whole slew of other fears, of course all based around keeping my kids safe.  I mean, I do have a lot to be concerned about when my kids think it's funny to run into the middle of a street with me running after them yelling at them to stop.  Sigh.  Being a mom is hard!  But that's a post for another day... 


  1. I am totally with you with the natural gas and deep water. Knobs on the front??? That genius didn't have kids... And you will NEVER see me on a cruise ship.
    Thanks for linking up!

  2. Came over from NJAH.....your fears sound perfectly reasonable to me. I am afraid of the stupidest thing imaginable: Squirrels.

    Yes. I said Squirrels.

    Can't help it. I know it's crazy!

    Thanks for sharing yours.

  3. I love this list! I have lived with ghosts so they don't scare me. I get the major heebies when I am alone at night, this is my unspoken reason for owning dog. They will keep me safe, right? I am afraid of cliffs and steep edges. I am always afraid that the car will go off one of those edges when we are driving thru the mountains.


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